The Bugle Index Page
A group of hardore Buglers decided one day to go through each Bugle and list down the the memorable, jokes, phrases, puns, and moments of the Bugle and now this dream is becoming a reality. Long jokes have the start time next to them. Reoccurring Jokes/Characters *The American: Ep. 2, 7, 14, 15, 19, 23, 27, 33, 42, 50, 55, 63, 87, 99, 109, 139, 158a *Hugo Chavez News: Ep. 5, 7 *Pun runs Ep. 48, 117 (Dog Puns), 126 (Pasta Puns), 133 (Asian Country Puns), 170 and 171 (Greek Puns), 172 (Latin Writers) *John Singing Ep.14, 33, 80.5 (Regulate) 85 (Holding Out for a Hero), 100 (Enter Sandman), 113 (Puppy Love), 114 (Anarchy in the UK), 126 (Let's Talk About Sex), 154 (Bump n' Grind)... *Andy calling Jesus guilty Ep. 4 *Mentioning the Guru. Ep. Issue 1: How like Vietnam is Iraq? *"If you really want to know how many balls to say Iraq is like Vietnam, it takes 3 balls" -John *"There are more suicides during party confrences then at any other time of the year. That is a lie but my point stands." -Andy *"A lot of people marry for love I think this is weak..." 10:01 *Armenia and the Genocide that wasn't... 12:13 *Andy's missing bin in the letter of St. Paul.... 13:46 *"The issue of human rights is more difficult than before because, there are more humans in the world, but unfortunatly there are the same numbers of rights to go around, so don't blame the government, blame maths." -Andy *Crisp manufacturers putting to much salt in crisps... 22:27 *One song ipod.... 24:24 *Terrorist literature choice... 26:34 Issue 2: The Empire Strikes Back *"We (Britain) did far, far worse things than America could even dream of doing, But we did it with a certain gentle manly swagger" John *Antarctica fact box *"We claimed we are going in there for scientific research,we just want to scientifically research how much oil we can get out of there, and maybe scientifically research how much money we can get paid for that oil. I don't see whats so hard for them to understand, there are going to be graphs.. There are going to be graphs. *Swearing Spectacular *First appearance of The American 15:00 *Johnny Wilkinson RWC world cup comentary 23:36 *Woles first appearance for the Tantrum Throwing Competition 25:44 Issue 3: California's Burning *Global Warming is unamerican ....2:03 (Main Story) *Al Gore Ruler of the earth...3:07﻿ *"These are the greatest days for exaggerations in the history of planet earth" John *Andy's first exchange rate joke...8:05 *"Like an hungry South African carnivore, spotting a sausage shop down a side street, things have taken a turn for the wurst" Andy's first Pun. *Belt Busting Breakfast Burrito...13:50 *Martin Yole's unbelievable Pressure routine... 20:19﻿ Issue 4: Immigrant's Song *Main story: Immigration Eveywhere... 1:55-12:18 **Tabloids reporting on a woman smuggling in immigrants in her stomach... 3:22 **Immigration factbox ...5:10 *Writers Guild strike: Andy makes a joke, labeled scab... 14:20 *Donald Rumsfeld's snowflakes / bumper stickers... 15:22 *Bugle Comment!: Westboro Baptist Church picketing soldier's funerals... 19:25 **"Do they hate gay people? Yes, yes they do. I think they've proven that time and time again. Do they hate gay people to the tune of $11 million?" -John *Bugle Newsfeature on Fuel/Biofuel/Alternative Enegry... 21:17 **"In Britian, we've always been pioneers of alternative energies and we were the first nation in the world to use Catholics as a fuel. Fact." -Andy *First instance of Andy calling Jesus guilty *Travel Supplement!: Why not visit Pakistan this week?... 29:00 Issue 5: 110 Per Cent Behind Musharraf *Bush tells Musharaf to relinquish control of the army...3:52 *Musharaf sarcastic slamming...4:40 *Pakistan quiz...5:15 *"What part of gift of democracy are these people struggling to understand!" -John *Andy's first suggestive complement of the queen...9:17 *"It is the queens english, if she wants it to sound nasal and boring, nasal and boring it must sound."- John *Second exchange rate joke... *"You can't put a price on a statement like that... well you can and that is 240,000 pounds"- John (on Tony Blairs speech in China) *King Juan Carlos of Spain tell Hugo Chavez to shut up.... 15:24 *Food scares and dangerous toys...16:23 *Date Rape Toys...18:42 *Total and Utter Fighting Championships...26:54 Issue 6: OPEC: Let's talk oil and fiery rhetoric Issue 7: 25 million people missing * Main Story: UK government loses 25 million peoples files in the post. 02:14 *Andy: The Queen should cut her own head off! 05:38 *John: "I shred the leftovers of every meal I eat, it's messy but it's safe." 07:40 * Next Story: Phenominal drop in violence in Iraq 08:55 *John: "The Whitehouse does now seem to be using the Presidents incompetence as its sole defence." 10:58 *Hugo Chavez News 10:58 *Juan Carlos telling Chavez to 'Shut up' becomes spanish ringtone. * Ask an American! 15:55 * Sport: English football is dead. 23:25 *Commemorative boo 25:47 *Audio cryptic crossword: 24 across 28:30 *Bugle Forecast 29:12 Issue 8: Austrailians keep touching the Queen Issue 9: Iran: Nukes or No Nukes? Issue 10: Have an Adequate Christmas Issue 10A: The Very Best (so far!) Issue 11: After Iowa, only 302 days left to go Issue 12: Bush brings yet more chaos to the Middle East Issue 13: After 433 years Sark finally gets democracy Issue 14: Money, Money, Money John sings money by Rick James (01:42) Main Story (01:55) Is the world on the brink of economic meltdown? *Another exchange rate joke (03:10) *John "The US sneezed its economic balls off" (03:55) *John "The french could be the most powerful people in the world if they all kept themselves to themselves" (08:35) Resignation News (08:40) *Andy "£100000 could buy a seventeen second long presidential campaign" (10:08) Middle East Update (11:00) *Gaza goes on an explosive shopping trip Mitt Romney factbox (12:50) *Andy "If you do get in a wrestling match with a pig, these are the steps you should take. ..." (16:33) Ask an American! (17:22) Emails *John announces he is a 'complete convert' to Hotties from History (26:05) *Mother Teresa Hotties Nomination (28:36) Bugle Sport Issue 21: Swearing at the Queen! Issue 24: Was Stonehenge an ancient taxdodge? THE BEST EMAIL EVER! Issue 25: John loves the Pope Issue 26: Food! Nonexistent Food! Issue 27: The Swimsuit Edition Issue 28: Dead Hill Walking Issue 29: Adults and Aliens Issue 30: Volcano Porn Issue 31: Sharon Stone fludges her pontullius Issue 32: Obama and KSM Issue 33: George Bush: 'Regrets? I've had a few' Issue 34: You Will Know Us By Our Knobbly Fruit "If you were a biscuit, what type of biscuit would you be?" "If you wern't a cunt, what type of job would you have?" Issue 35: Barack Obama and his disappearing change hat Issue 35*: Independence Day Special Issue 36: Oil Prices, recession & inflation but what do the G8 do? Have an 18 course meal Issue 37: Barack Obama is coming to Europe! Issue 38: Karadzic's Scooby Doo disguise Issue 39: McCain, Andy and John plumb new depths with their Obama attack ad Issue 40: Osama Bin Laden's taxi driver Issue 41: Russia gets gold at Olympic sport of invasion Issue 42: An Olympics Special Issue 43: Democratic convention special Issue 44: Republican Convention Special Issue 44.1: The sub-issue you've all been waiting for Issue 45: Help Save The Investment Banker Issue 46: Economic Armageddon Approacheth Issue 47: Sarah Palin- One giant leap backwards for humankind Issue 48: How Low Will They Go? Issue 49: Joe the plumber now regrets chatting to Barack Obama Issue 50: US Election nearly over! Issue 51: Let it all be over soon! Issue 52: Spoiler alert! Obama won Issue 53: Obama and his not so secret code name Issue 54: The Vegas Special Issue 55a: The Thanksgiving Special Issue 55: Shooting One's Own Leg Issue 56: Selling Barack Obamas seat Issue 57: Hats off to Obama shoes off for Bush Issue 58: What Did you get for Xmas? Peace In The Middle East? Issue 59: Why Obama's inauguration will be like the Rio carnival Issue 60: Goodbye George Hello Barack Issue 61: Obama Inauguration Special Issue 62: Obama and his do nothing wonderland Issue 63: Foreign Snow Invades Britain Issue 64: Bankers pretend to apologise Issue 64 Appendage 1: The new webpage guided tour Issue 65: Will Obamas stimulus revive the world economy? Who cares Issue 66: Brown gets rubbish present from Obama Issue 67: Monkey News Special! Issue 68: Obama and his Al Qaeda Style Video Issue 69: Possibly the longest penis joke in the world, ever Issue 70: G-G-G-G-G-GEEEE 20 Issue 70.1: Supplementary Easter Egg Issue 71: Torture and Dictators special Issue 72: The Real Swine Flu Vaccine Issue 73: Are the Taliban skiing down the Swat Valley? Issue 74: Claiming expenses for MPs that do not exist Issue 75: What to do with Gitmo let fear decide Issue 76: Calling out North Korea Issue 77: Gordon Brown gets a bad dose of the quits Issue 78: Apathy or the far right Europe decides Issue 79: Iranian election special Issue 80: Iran, pick on a country your own size! Issue 80 point 5: Independence Day Special Issue 81: The G8 the world's slowest superheroes Issue 82: Freedom of Speech Special Issue 83: Obama pay for this or you will be dead Issue 84: Future Special Issue 85: I need a hero! Bill Clinton goes to North Korea Issue 86: Burma triumphs in made up crime prevention Issue 87: Afghanistan celebrates election with fireworks or guns Issue 88: Iran and its glitzy show trials Issue 88.1: Travel Section The Bugle is still on holiday Issue 89: Good Health Bad Health Issue 90: Bring on the crazy, Gaddafi! Issue 91: Happy Birthday Communist China Issue 92: Obama wins first preemptive Nobel Peace Prize Issue 93: Peak Oil Special Issue 94: Does the EU really want El Presidente Blair Issue 94 and a half: Autumn Vacation Issue 95: Walls Wars and Power Issue 96: Two Star Review for this year's Queen's Speech Issue 96A: Thanksgiving for Berlusconi Issue 97: Bad News for Stupid Buildings, Afghanistan and shoes Issue 98: Britant can no longer afford defence against aliens Issue 99: Berlusconi takes a cathedral to the face Issue 99A: The Best of 99 Bugles Issue 99B: The Bugle Musical Special Issue 100: The 100th Episode Issue 101: Barack Obama and how to lose hope and irritate people Issue 102: Why the global economy is like elvis Issue 103: Climate change denial and Narnia of nutcases Issue 104: Valentines Day Special Link to mp3 Issue 104a: Where is John? Link to mp3 Issue 105: Back off our islands Argentina! Link to mp3 Issue 106: The American right to flip the bird Link to mp3 Issue 107: An Ethics Special Link to mp3 Issue 108: Eyes on Africa Link to mp3 Issue 109: In Rude Health Link to mp3 Issue 110: Britain Holds Its Breath Link to mp3 Issue 111: Some Seroiously Bad Pope-ing Link to mp3 Issue 112: Birthday Party! Super Best Friends Invited! Link to mp3 Issue 113: Countdown to Vote-ageddon Link to mp3 Issue 114: Waking Up In A Different Britain Link to mp3 Issue 115: Five more years of this Link to mp3 The Bugle: Recent Decents - May 2010 Link to mp3 Issue 116: Freeze The Oil Link to mp3 Issue 117: She bored'er colleagues Link to mp3 Issue 118: World Cup Special Link to mp3 Issue 119: Oil Never Dot It Again Link to mp3 Issue 120: McChrystal Balls Link to mp3 Issue 121: I spy with my little eye.. Link to mp3 Issue 122: Donald Trump in drag Link to mp3 Issue 122a: History of the World Part 1 Link to mp3 Issue 122b: History of the World Part 2 Link to mp3 Issue 122g: History of the World Part 3 Link to mp3 Issue 122d: History of the World Part 4 Link to mp3 Issue 123: That clock is pimped out! Link to mp3 Issue 124: Brazilliant! Link to mp3 Issue 125: Donor Fatigue Link to mp3 Issue 126: Let's talk about peace, baby Link to mp3 Issue 127: 12 Friends and 1 Champion Link to mp3 Issue 128: UN-couth Link to mp3 Issue 129: Kim Jong Unbelievable Link to mp3 Issue 130: Fire Sale Link to mp3 Issue 131: A Miner Celebration Link to mp3 Issue 132: Massive Cuts Link to mp3 Issue 132 and a bit: Cut for a reason Link to mp3 Issue 132 and an old bit: No Bugle Link to mp3 Issue 133: Backwang Forever Link to mp3 Issue 134: Royal Wedding Souvenir Edition Link to mp3 Issue 135: Kim Jong il-conceived Link to mp3 Issue 136: Do I Not Leak That Link to mp3 Issue 137: Crazies Special Link to mp3 Issue 138: A Christmas Bugle! Link to mp3 Issue 138a: More Old Gold Link to mp3 Issue 138b: Review of 2010 Link to mp3 Issue 139: *Spoiler alert* 2011 Preview Special Link to mp3 Issue 140: The Divorce of a Nation Link to mp3 Issue 141: Tunisia is Revolting Link to mp3 Issue 142: Egypt Erupts Link to mp3 Issue 143: Egypt crisis - a good time to buy a jumper Link to mp3 Issue 144: No Going Mubarak Link to mp3 Issue 144a: Lowlights 2011 *"Some shit bits that weren't good enough to go on recent shows" - Andy *(19:20) Chris says that Andy and John don't love us as much as he does, and he can "barely, barely hold back the contempt I have for you at the best of times". Fuck you Chris. Link to mp3 Issue 145: Libyeah or Libyna *First ever Bugle from Asia, first Bangalore Bugle. *British imperialism bit *400 Years to the day since Swiss King Olaf The Weird inadvertently discovered skiing *As many Bugles as flavors of ice cream at John the Baptist's 5th birthday party *Top Story: Unrest Update; Libyikes! *Gaddafi bits *"Gaddafi is like Puff Daddy or Madonna, Andy. When you've been in power for as long as he has, you have to keep re-inventing yourself so that you stay relevant and people don't get bored" - John *Silvio Berlusconi news (23:45) *"We've all got our Hosni Mubarak excuses" - Andy *Leadership birthday news (26:20) *Robert Mugabe turned 87 this week. Sent a cermonial 87 "fuck you"s from the rest of the planet *Uganda news (28:10) *Bugle feature section: travel! (30:05) *British imperialism reference Link to mp3 Issue 146: Long over-Jew Link to mp3 Issue 146a: Lowerlights 2011 Link to mp3 Issue 147: Man Versus Nature Link to mp3 Issue 147a: Zaltman, live from Dhaka Link to mp3 Issue 147b: More Salztman, live from Dhaka Link to mp3 Issue 148: Mayhem Update Link to mp3 Issue 149: #crucifybieber Link to mp3 Issue 150: Royal Wedding Preview Link to mp3 Issue 151: Regal Bugle Link to mp3 Issue 152: Compromised to a permanent end Link to mp3 Issue 153: Wake Up, Gaddafi Link to mp3 Issue 154: Keep it in your pants Link to mp3 Issue 155: The Queen is on fire! Link to mp3 Issue 156: Who's Tailin' Palin? Link to mp3 Issue 157: Reacting like a coiled donut Link to mp3 Issue 158: Hot Rod & Dragster Strike Out Link to mp3 Issue 158a: Trully Offal Link to mp3 Issue 159: Everything Must Go! Link to mp3 Issue 160: News Out Of This World Link to mp3 Issue 161: Hacking: A self esteem issue Link to mp3 Issue 162: Making a mountain out of a mountain Link to mp3 Issue 163: Debt To America Link to mp3 Issue 163a: Too Offal Link to mp3 Issue 164: Ich Bin Ein Hulkmaniac Link to mp3 Issue 165: Bashar goes to Madcon 1 Link to mp3 Issue 166: Gaddafi's Last Bugle? Link to mp3 Issue 166a: We're back, Andy Link to mp3 Issue 166b: This offal tastes funny Link to mp3 Issue 166g: Offal Edinburgher Link to mp3 Issue 167: Berlusconi: Hard to swallow Link to mp3 Leaders Special #1: Silvio Berlusconi Link to mp3 Leaders Special #2L Mahmood Ahmadinejad Link to mp3 Issue 168: Streets of Rage Link to mp3 Issue 169: Captain Crazy corks it Link to mp3 Issue 170: It's time to ban slap bass Link to mp3 Issue 171: A Greek Tragedy link to mp3 Issue 172: Berlusconi bows out Link to mp3 Issue 173: Techno! Techno! Technocrat! Link to mp3 Issue 173a: Turkey Offal Link to mp3 Issue 174: Britain's Back Baby! Link to mp3 Issue 175: Putin the boot in Link to mp3 Issue 176: Deep Space Nine Link to mp3 The Best of 2011: Part 1 Link to mp3 The Best of 2011: Part 2 Link to mp3 Issue 177: Weapons of mass election Link to mp3 Issue 178: The Final Countdown Link to mp3